September 13, 2012

How To Gain Weight

 After I had Davis, I learned a couple things. Now I'm going to share them with you. 
Mostly, I've learned how to gain POST-BABY weight. 
Now, now...gaining weight is pretty let me tell you some sure-fire ways to pack on those LBS. 

He's having Mac & Cheese? better eat some of that stuff too. 
Pancakes? Yes. Yogurt? Yes. Eat it ALL. Even if you JUST ate your own food before.
If he leaves some on his plate, now is your best chance to gobble up the rest of it.
Don't leave ANYTHING left on that plate, ya hear me?! That's a HUGE no no.

If by "workout" you think I'm talking about running or going to the gym - you're wrong.
I mean, consider that running outside with your 15 month old for ten minutes is a good enough workout for the day. Never..and I mean NEVER go downstairs to that treadmill and actually run on it. Heaven forbid. 

You know when you are eating, and you look down at your stomach, and suddenly, you think - am I pregnant? Oh nope..that's just a big ol' food baby. Yup. That's the goal. 
Eat whatever you want. Candy, cookies, chips, etc. My fave? Halloween candy that was on the shelves in August. That's an awesome idea. And especially eat late at night after your husband has gone to bed so you don't feel ashamed about it. Then hide all of the wrappers so he doesn't see them.
Oh...and eat guacamole & chips like they're going out of style. 

This one is my favorite. I've been saying this for 15 months and I still love this excuse. 
It works like a charm if you want to keep gaining weight. 

So there you have it. some Halloween Candy and check that one off the list. 


In all seriousness (that was all sarcasm, if you are kinda slow ;)...this is what I've been telling myself for the last year. I'm in a rut. I need to change. I used to be REALLY into working out and eating pretty healthy. I looked great at one time, and I actually felt really good about my body. After baby...not so much. I've managed to keep most of my baby weight cleverly hidden under my clothes, and avoid mirrors when I'm nekkid. 

And can I tell you how much I love Fall? I mean, layers & layers of clothes to hide all that junk I eat? Yes, please. 

I'm just not happy with my body, if I'm being completely honest. After having a baby, it does something to your psyche. I don't think I've ever fully admitted or come to terms with what pregnancy did to my body. Stretch marks, acne scarring, and saggy skin are NOT things you really wish upon yourself. And no, I would never EVER take back the wonderful blessing that is my baby boy. Ever. 
I mean look at him - he loves me! :)

But at the same time, I think I would be lying if I said that I would give anything 
to have my old body back. 

Now..I'm not saying I'm this huge, fat, beast walking around.
And I'm not fishing for compliments--but if you want to give me some, go ahead ;).
And I'm REALLY trying to not make this sound like a pity party (is it working?).

I'm more just getting this out there, because I've been feeling really crappy. So I've been (for the last week anyway) REALLY REALLY trying to lose the rest of this baby weight. My goal is to be at my pre-baby weight (before I decide to have another one). 

Now, I ACTUALLY am really off to go run on my treadmill! HOLLA!
So wish me luck...I'm going to need it!!


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  1. what an amazing brave post! :) i know how you feel with starting to not care about what you're eating when you've passed a point where it seems not to matter - but you can do it! all the luck, and perseverance, to you!
    kw, Ladies in Navy

  2. Getting that baby weight off is hard but you can do it. Just remember how you feel right now. I sometimes dread going and working out but I know that I feel THAT much better once I have gone and done so.

  3. 1. I think you look FAB! 2. You should try out some classes at your local gym! When I started working out I was never motivated so I turned to Zumba, kick boxing, yoga, are way more accountable with other people there!

  4. You are so cute! But I know what you mean after having a baby, just not the same.

  5. how about a "how to gain weight" for all us non baby folk :)
    oh, that's right. i eat everything in sight. i'm pretty sure i can figure out why i gain all the weights.

    also, you look fab. so just keep eating that guacamole and share some with me.

  6. uummm yet another reason I love you! i was laughing out loud ... you are seriously DARLING...I love you tons saggy boobs and all ;) ha I kid I kid!

  7. ok. ive never had a baby but first off, my compliment is that you are seriously such a hot mama. for real.

    also, what i found that works for me, is to find a time that i feel good working out. (for me its in the afternoon.) then i have someone keep me accountable. i tell them i am going to work out and i have them text me to see if i actually do it.

    also, this is so SHAMEFUL to admit, but i totally workout using my cable's exercise channel. (On Demand on comcast?-- yeah i do it.)

  8. my response to the first half of this post: hahahha.

    My response to the second half of this post: you go, girl. :)

  9. You are beautiful! Seriously. I know exactly how you feel though. Losing the baby weight is hard. Oh, and so is not eating your child's leftovers!!! Haha!

  10. Not fishing for compliments but you're a good looking girl, don't let yourself go! remember it's easy to put on but very hard to take weight off.. good luck!


  11. I absolutely LOVE this. I am so over people complaining about losing baby weight the minute they give birth! Enjoy your life and time with your child while you can!

  12. oh my gosh you crack me up...but in all serious, we are all right there with you. i'll head to the treadmill with you!

  13. You are too funny! Working out after baby is SO hard. I was super lucky that all my weight came off just from breastfeeding because I don't know that I worked out a single day from day 1 to year 1. I've only started walking again when I became pregnant this go-round. I think ALL moms understand! There isn't a single minute for YOU after babies. No time to think about eating healthy or working out. Blah, unless we work hard to make time. And well, that just takes too much work! I hope you can find some kind of exercise to get you into the groove again. I've really been wanting to try swimming or Zumba :)

  14. This was so funny. I started working out at home & eating right and I'm at my pre-baby weight. I'm so much happier with myself. Ps. Running on the treadmill can hurt your knees, be careful!

  15. This was so funny. I started working out at home & eating right and I'm at my pre-baby weight. I'm so much happier with myself. Ps. Running on the treadmill can hurt your knees, be careful!

  16. I so just laughed out loud as I read this! Try having a food blog, trying to lose baby weight, and doing everything you mentioned above!

    The thing that has worked for me is finding a workout buddy, someone that will hold you accountable to wake up at 6am to go running:) Good luck!!

  17. hahah you're hilarious. you still look amazing, I wouldn't stress too much. give the 30 day shred a try (all the vids are on youtube)... it's pretty awesome. i'm on day 4

  18. Haha! I'm with you sister...I work at Chick-fil-A. Have for 2 years. I have a feeling that the second I stop working around all those UNLIMITED WAFFLE FRIES AND CHICKEN NUGGETS all 10-15 of those stinkin' pounds will fall off. Maybe. But seriously, it's given me a chance to really love my body, just because God gave it to me...even when I'm nekkid in the mirror ;)

  19. haha this makes me laugh :)

    being pregnant has changed my perception of my body and some days i embrace the bump entirely and love it and other days well the word fat might be said like loads of times. your body changing is hard and i can hardly remember what i used to look like.

    but it is nice to know others find it difficult too and i have to remember not to do all those things otherwise my pre baby body will remain a distant memory ;)

  20. Funny! Fishing or not, I think you're very lovely Jenna. I lost the baby weight super-fast but found that after a few months out of the gym with little time to work out, the lbs slowly crept on. While I may be back to weight again, my muscle tone is similar to that of a 70 year-old. Eek! Hoping my Jillian Michaels videos can change that for me soon ;)

  21. Well you are beyond hott to me but I want you to feel comfortable about your body and strive for overall health, so work it girl. You know I am obsessed with treadmills!

  22. I feel ya in being in a rut- and GOOD for you for getting ready to jump back on the healthy horse before winter- please rub off on my so I do to?!?!

  23. Girl, I feel your pain! Except I gained all my weight before I had my kiddo. ;) A desk job plus eating fast food for lunch everyday for several years will do that to a girl. And I hate working out. Really I do. I lost about 30 lbs this spring using the MyFitnessPal on my Kindle. It worked really well for me. If you are curious about it, let me know. ;)
    I think you look fine, but I wish you good luck on your journey. :)

  24. I know the feeling lady! I just had to somehow make myself accountable for what and WHEN I was stuffing my face! You look great either way and remember. One year on, One year OFF! And sometimes eating Halloween candy in August is okay.

    XOXO BoldButterBaby

  25. I heart your sarcasm. And I'm in this boat with you... minus the baby. ha. I've just quit caring lately and have GOT to make a change. I attempted it this week and did good until I had a slow night at work. My fat ass at THREE sloppy joes. Like really!? WTH! Out of pure boredom. I need a class on will power because I have none!

  26. Oh, and I forgot to mention that I don't think your fat at all and I think you are drop dead gorgeous. There's your compliment, you sexy ginger you!

  27. I love this post!! Its like I wrote it! Love that it is how you feel but you made it funny too!! GL with your weight loss goals, even though I think you always look amazing!!!! :)

  28. this is so funny! and true!!! bah!


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